A whisper louder than a thousand cries
by Charming the Snake 13
Summary: A small drabble about Cersei and Robert's wedding and the night that followed.


Cersei smiled happily as she buried her face in a small bouquet of scarlet roses and inhaled their fresh, exquisitely tender scent. They had just been brought in from the gardens and she could still feel the cold drops of morning dew as they rolled off the delicate petals and onto her no less delicate skin.

"Oh, my lady, do please be careful" – her maid exclaimed as her skilled hands wove Cersei's long, silky hair of shining Lannister gold into an rather simple, but elegant coiffure – "It would be a disaster to cut you face on the day of your wedding"

"I will not cut myself" – Cersei replied with joyful pride as she handed one rich, scarlet blossom to the smiling maid– "This is the happiest day of my life and it shall be perfect!"

In less than an hour she would walk into the Great Sept of Baelor as Cersei Lannister and leave it Cersei Baratheon, queen of the Seven Kingdoms and wife to the great warrior, rebel and king Robert Baratheon, first of his name.

"The people of King's Landing have been waiting since yesterday night around the Great Sept of Baelor to catch a glimpse of the ceremony" – the maid sighed, taking two rosebuds from the young mistresses hand and attaching them carefully to her hair – "Everyone yearns to see our king wed the most beautiful lady in the realm. All the women in the Seven Kingdoms envy you, my lady"

"They should envy me" – Cersei smiled contentedly as she felt the blossoms burden her hair.

"It is a great honor to become queen, but his grace is the honored one" – the maid smiled proudly – "Your ladyship is the greatest prize any man could wish for. I hope his grace fully understands the value of what he's getting…"

"Of course he does" – Cersei huffed feeling almost outraged – "I am the only daughter of lord Tywin Lannister!"

Cersei felt fluttering butterflies tickle her stomach as she thought of her betrothed. Like every other girl in the land she had been dreaming of him ever since he won the battle of the Trident which decided the outcome of the war. She would remember forever the joyous moment when her father, Lord Tywin, came back from the war and announced that as soon as Robert is crowned lord the seven kingdoms, he would be married to Cersei, thus creating an alliance that would cement the peace of the realm. Cersei didn't really care about the peace and prosperity of the seven kingdoms. All she could think about was that the handsome, young, valiant and victorious rebel was a dream come true, the gift from the Gods now belonged to her. For months Cersei had been counting days and hours to meet her future husband Robert on the day of their wedding and pledge herself to him for all eternity.

"But what about us?" – Cersei suddenly heard Jaime's desolate, yearning voice echo across her mind remembering their last unpleasant conversation in a remote and secluded corner of the gardens.

"What about us?!" – she had snapped at her brother and her lover as she pushed him away, annoyed at his desperate attempts to kiss her and scared to death someone might see them.

"We belong together, don't we? We came into this world together, we go through it together and we leave it together. Isn't that what we've always planned and wished for?" – Jaime whispered, his handsome face looking almost deformed with anguish – "I touched you and you touched me so many times… we were one body and soul! Doesn't that mean anything? Don't you love me anymore?"

"Of course I love you, Jaime" – Cersei sighed, hugging him gently, hoping to comfort her brother, but keep her lover at bay – "You're my dearest brother, my best friend, my twin and you always will be. But I am promised to king Robert, I'm going to marry him and I want to marry him"

"Yes, and I will have to smile at your wedding and stand guard outside the king's chamber on your wedding night" – Jaime groaned – "How can I live with this, Cersei? Seeing him kiss you, hearing him make love to you, watching him take my place in your heart every single day? How can I bear it?!"

"You will bear it because you're a Lannister. And you're my brother" – Cersei said proudly – "You will do it for me and for our house"

Jaime pulled out of her embrace and turned away silently. Cersei sighed and stroked his face gently as her heart ached with guilt and sympathy. She couldn't bear to see her brother so hurt, but was it really so terrible of her to want to love her husband?

"Please, Jaime" – she whispered sweetly, turning his face back to hers and looking deeply into his beautiful sad, loving eyes – "I could never be happy if I knew you were miserable and I want so much to be happy. I want us both to be happy. And that is why I will love my husband and you will accept it and forget me. Can you do that for us?"

"I will never forget you" - Jaime answered bitterly – "But I will be perfectly content in the knowledge that you are happily married"

"Thank you, my darling!" – Cersei smiled and kissed her brother on the cheek.

Suddenly the air was filled with the loud, melodious, joyful ringing of the city bells. The king had arrived at the sept and was waiting for his bride to follow.

Cersei's heart leaped to her throat as she heard the faint sounds of her father's confident unhurried approaching footsteps. Lord Tywin was coming to escort his daughter through the streets of King's Landing to the Great Sept of Baelor and give her away to the man the Gods themselves destined to be her husband.

"All done, my lady" – the maid said happily, letting go of Cersei's hair and removing the piece of cloth that protected the wedding gown from her shoulders.

"Finally" – Cersei smiled as she got up and straightened out the folds of her dress.

"Oh, my lady, you look so beautiful!" – the maid exclaimed, clapping her hands happily - "When the people see you, they will compose songs about the most beautiful queen the capital has ever seen which will be sung for years to come!"

Before Cersei could reply, the door opened and her father came in, looking wonderfully elegant in his black leather doublet, decorated with several pairs of golden Lannister lions.

"Are you ready?" – he asked calmly, eyeing his daughter from head to toe.

"Yes, father" – Cersei answered happily, seeing a gleam of silent pride and approval in his cold, golden eyes.

"Come than" – lord Tywin invited, as he opened the door for her.

Cersei took a deep breath and a quick look at herself in the huge full – length mirror.

She really was magnificently beautiful even if she did say so herself! Her exquisite wedding gown by tradition was dark red and richly decorated with golden embroidery. The finest dornish silk clung to her body, emphasizing the tender ivory of her skin, bringing out the deep shining emeralds of her eyes and showing off her shapely figure perfectly. Her thick, flowing, golden hair came down below her shoulders in neat locks and waves, intertwined with beautiful red roses.  
Of course her husband would fall in love with her at first sight! It was impossible not to!

The Great Sept of Baelor was drowning in light and colors and sounds as Cersei walked down the long staircase and across the floor on the arm of her father. Their slow dignified motion was accompanied by delighted looks and sighs of rapture from every corner of the enormous building, packet to the brim with lords and noble men of the seven kingdoms and their ladies, but Cersei couldn't care less. Her eyes, her heart, all of her being were fixed solely on the tall, stately figure of the man who was standing next to the High Septon, waiting for her.  
Members of the King's Guard saluted her as she approached the stairs to the altar. Jaime was no doubt among them, but Cersei didn't notice him. She barely even registered her father pulling his arm away and standing aside as she took the last few steps up the top of the altar.

"My, don't you look lovely" – her bridegroom said with a broad jolly smile on his face as he held out his arm to greet her.

"Thank you, my lord" – Cersei answered breathlessly, looking completely mesmerized by the man standing in front of her.

Robert Baratheon was truly as handsome as he was reputed to be, like a valiant knight out of a song or legend. He was tall, stout and muscular with strong, yet refined features, thick black hair and merry, almost care – free light green eyes. He didn't look at all like the hard, serious warrior - king Cersei had pictured in her mind, instead he seemed to radiate warmth, charm, good will and humor.  
This, surely, was a kind, gentle and caring man, Cersei thought as she took Robert's hand and turned to face the High Septon. Someone to spend a long, happy life with and bear many beautiful children for. As many as she possibly could…

"You may now cloak the bride and bring her under your protection" – came the voice of the High Septon and Cersei smiled as she felt Robert wrap his yellow cloak around her shoulders. It was long and rather heavy and decorated with a huge dancing black stag.  
Her new sigil, Cersei thought with pride.

"We stand here in the sight of the Seven to witness the union of man and wife" – the High Septon continued – "One flesh, one heart, one soul. Now and forever"

Cersei felt her heart dance about in her chest and her soul soar high above the world, lifted by pure happiness. She didn't hear any of the words the septon uttered, but she didn't really need to. All she knew was that now she belonged to this dream – prince, this fairytale knight who was standing beside her with a radiant smile on his face, waiting to love her and to be loved.  
Of course she had heard of his previous engagement to the wolf – girl, but he couldn't possibly be in love with her. Not now, when she was dead and he had seen his new bride, who was far more beautiful and refined.

"In the sight of the seven I hereby seal these two souls, binding them as one for eternity" – the septon said, tying a silk yellow ribbon around their joined hands – "Look upon one another and say the words"

"Father, Smith, Warrior, Mother, Maiden, Crone, Stranger" – Cersei uttered, drowning in her husband's light green yes and meaning every word with all her heart – "I am his and he is mine. From this day, until the end of my days"

Cersei closed her eyes and felt her whole body catch fire as Robert placed his large, strong hands on her waist and his sweet lips touched hers for the first time. She let out a slight moan as his tongue brushed her teeth and barely restrained herself from opening her mouth and letting her tongue taste and explore him.  
We have all the time in the world for that, Cersei thought pulling away reluctantly. It would never do for a queen to act lustfully in front of the whole realm.

The wedding feast was as grand an affair as Cersei had ever seen. The food was delicious, wine was flowing in rivers, songs were played and dances danced until you drop. She barely had a chance to sit down between welcoming guests, making small talk, dancing with her husband, his friends, the lords of the realm and then Robert again. Cersei was very happy to do her duty as a queen for the first time and was glad to perceive the delighted mood of the guests, who seemed to be impressed by her gracious kindness and affability.  
They had good reason to be, Cersei thought, feeling very pleased with herself. She was being uncommonly gracious to everyone, even her wretched dwarf of a brother, who insisted on attending the wedding, though Cersei would have gladly seen him left behind at Casterly Rock.

The only thing that worried her a little bit was the amount of wine her husband drank and the pace at which he downed his cups. She had never seen anyone drink so much and it definitely wasn't a good sign…

But then again, her father and his bannermen rarely drank wine at all. Perhaps the amount Robert drank wasn't all that horrifying, compared to other men. And it was their wedding feast after all… a man should be allowed to have fun on his wedding day…  
Perhaps Robert was feeling nervous before their wedding night, Cersei thought trying to logically destroy the fear that was slowly creeping into her heart as she watched her husband pour wine down his throat.

"Let the bedding begin!" – Robert's voice roared suddenly across the room, making Cersei jump with fright. She only managed to catch a glimpse of her husband grabbing the wastes of two court ladies and kissing a third before she was swept off her feet and carried to the royal chamber by a crowd of men.  
The bedding ceremony was supposed to be fun for the guests and excite the lord and lady who were about to consummate their marriage and Cersei was looking forward to making some naughty jokes and embarrassing some of the men who would try to strip her of her clothes. But now she wasn't happy at all and didn't really want to join the fun. All she could think of was Robert kissing the other woman.  
True enough, some small liberties were allowed at the Bedding, but that kiss just didn't feel right, Cersei thought worriedly. Her husband wasn't supposed to kiss anyone except her, not like that anyway…

Soon Cersei was carried into the royal chamber by the laughing and joking lords and knights, who put her into the bed fully dressed. They bowed and retreated quickly to wait outside the door for king Robert who, strangely enough was nowhere to be found.  
Cersei sat quietly on the edge of the bed and waited for her husband to join her. She had completely lost track of time as she listened to the laughter outside slowly subside and then vanish completely at the sound of Jaime's angry voice.  
Her sweet brother was doing his best to prevent further embarrassment to a queen whose lord and husband seemed to have forgotten his way to her bed on their wedding night, no less.

Finally the door opened and Robert appeared on the threshold, looking at her lustfully, horribly drunk and barely able to stand. His doublet and shirt were ripped open and his untied breeches were only just holding around his waist.

"There she is!" – he muttered drunkenly and launched himself forward, desperately trying to maintain a straight line. Before Cersei knew what was going on, he brusquely grabbed her waist and threw her onto the bed.  
She gasped and turned away in disgust as she felt a strong stench of wine hit her face when Robert fell down beside her and kissed her sleazily.

"I have been dreaming about this for a long long time, my darling" – he sniggered and tore open her beautiful dress with one single movement of his arm.

Cersei was shocked by his roughness, but lay down obediently as Robert climbed onto her clumsily. Groaning and grunting contentedly, he bit and slobbered all over her neck and breasts, mumbling something coarse and filthy and stroking her inner thighs and a little higher with his hand. Cersei felt very angry and completely repulsed by his uncouthness.

Was this the same dream - knight she met at the Sept? Was this gross, vulgar brute the beautiful, tender man she swore herself to?! Who did he think she was, some tavern slut?! – she thought bitterly as her husband continued his ministrations.  
Suddenly he pushed open Cersei's legs, lay down on top of her, almost crushing her with his weight and guided his formidable manhood into her with his hand. She stifled a scream of pain as he entered her unaroused body roughly and forcefully and began bumping against her.  
Cersei grimaced and gritted her teeth as she lay listless, feeling Robert pound into her, grunting and moaning with ecstasy. Fortunately the wine seemed to be taking its toll and the whole business ended very soon in Robert crying out his rapture and collapsing next to her. Cersei tried to move over to her side of the bed and stay as far away as she possibly could, but Robert hugged her tightly, placed his head in the crook of her neck and whispered quietly

"Oh, Lyanna…"

With that he closed his eyes and was soon snoring contentedly.

Once she was sure Robert was passed out, Cersei crawled carefully out of his embrace, wrapped her ruined dress around herself and crept to the door.  
She opened it carefully, hoping to run unnoticed to her own chambers, but was immediately stopped by Jaime, who was still standing guard.

"Cersei?!" – he gasped in alarm, looking over her ripped dress, her disheveled hair and red eyes, filled with tears.

"Oh, Jaime!" – she cried, falling into her brother's arms and sobbing loudly against his chest – "It was so awful!"

"Shhhhh!" – Jaime whispered as he hugged his dearest sister tightly – "It's all over now, my sweet! All over now!"

No it isn't, Cersei wanted to scream at the top of her lunges for the whole realm to hear as tears of bitter disappointment and grave insult streamed down her face.  
There was so mush to cry about… her love for a handsome, gentle, dashing fantasy knight had been shattered like a childish dream. Everything she had heard about her new husband's habits of drinking and whoring and dismissed as terrible lies turned out to be true. She was married for life to a gross, drunken lout, who never even heard the word 'fidelity', didn't care where he stuck his cock and whose idea of love - making was a terrible let – down.  
But worst of all, the one thing she would never forgive and forget was the crushingly humiliating whisper that still rang in her ears louder than a thousand cries…


End file.
